MEN ARE FROM MARS, WOMEN FROM EARTH...

Men? Well, I don’t hate or love them not yet anyway. I have a dad and four older brothers. I am sure they are men but when it comes men in the society at large I have a phobia socialising with them. Wherever I walk along roads and pathways, I will feel insecure. I am very nervous and uncomfortable being with men who are complete strangers to me. It seems like a cultural shock to me. I tend to have biased opinions about men who seemed to be more hypocritic shallow and weird than women. They seemed to have hidden agendas when looking at women. It is very hard for me to communicate with them on even terms . I lack the self- confidence to have conversations with men whom I hardly knew. I seemed to be more self-conscious and reserved about what men will think of me. I prefer talking to women than talking to men. Of course that is for now years on who knows. They tend to give you that ‘I’m not interested look!' and basically ignore you . It is hard for women to persuade them to cooperate especially in group tasks. They prefer to let women do the talking and the tasks. If things go well and smoothly they wont hesitate to accept all the credits and accolades.

Men, when they talk women better listen. Their thoughts and opinions are the best there are. They have faultless opinions. They have egos as big as their heads. Some things are beyond them to discuss too small and insignificant even to be mentioned to them. Men who are good and attentive listeners are a dying breed.
They talk in a strange language about football rugby sports cars and motorbikes and will be annoyed if women say they dont understand a word men say. To them women are beyond comprehension. For now maybe I am yet to be interested in them so I tend to keep my distance. This may be due to my strict upbringing and to my limited interactions with them since my primary schooldays. Time and emotions may change all that.
Having said all that men do have objective opinions, ideas, knowledge and creativity as well. I am happy to communicate with them whenever the needs arise and there are tasks to be done on academic grounds. Being a woman I am never saying you dont need a man as in due time you may worship one (he! he!)
but for now men yeechhhh . ( takyah masuk ....heh heh) I have read somewhere this saying about men which I would like to share with everybody. "A man is imcomplete until he gets married. Then he is finished."

TOMORROW NEVER COMES??!

The phrase ‘I’ll do it tomorrow’ is synonymous to me. Whenever I have tasks to do I tend to put them aside and wait and wait until the last moments. At times I will conveniently choose and focus on finishing the easier tasks ignoring the unpleasant ones. I prefer to work on the more interesting tasks even though they do take a lot more time to finish. I realized that being a procrastinator is a serious problem and procrastination really can be very stressful to me in some ways but I enjoy working under this type of pressure. I think that I am able to produce better quality work as my ideas will flow more easily and more effectively. I will gain lots of confidence when I am able to meet the datelines . It will be a little bit rush doing muliple tasks simultaneously but hey, that’s me. I never complain about it but at times, I do feel stressed out. Procrastination is one bad habit and very nerve wrecking making me restless and often times missing my good night sleeps as well when I have datelines to meet. My parents and friends have already talked to me about this bad habit of mine, being a procrastinator. As they say procrastination is a waste of time and if I may add of energy.

To overcome this annoying habit need strict self discipline and prudent time management. I need to do and complete tasks according to priorities and needs and not on my whims and fancies. These acquired skills will stand in good stead if and when I join the working environment. I tried my very best to instill self-discipline including following set schedules and promising doing tasks immediately but there seemed to be too many social and interactive distractions in my life preventing me from succeeding. It will work for a few days and then business will be back as usual. Well, I believe that to solve this problem needs self resolution and personal objectives as well as vision. I need the courage to presevere and stick to a proper time management regime in order to consistently finished doing those tasks assigned to me. I also must motivate and remind myself that procrastination just wont do. I am just a normal person with normal bad habits so I need to be reminded all the times. I am trying not to be a procrastinator . I will keep trying to change this bad habit of mine starting tomorrow. Well, better try than never or is it better late . .. Oh! never mind.

The teribble script -Revisited

ACT 1, SCENE 1

IBN BATTUTA SETS OUT FOR DELHI, INDIA TO SEEK OFFICIAL EMPLOYMENT AND HE HAD ALREADY SIGNED A CONTRACT AGREEING THAT HE WOULD STAY IN INDIA. WHILE HE IS WALKING IN THE MARKET NEAR THE SEAPORT, SUDDENLY HE HEARD AN ANNOUNCEMENT THAT THE SULTAN, MUHD TUGHLUQ WANTS TO HIRE A JUDGE IMMEDIATELY…

SETTING : AT THE SEAPORT OF DELHI
TIME : SOMETIME IN THE AFTERNOON
CHARACTERS : IBN BATTUTA
ANNOUNCER
TRANSLATOR
PERSON 1

ANNOUNCER : (Yelling) (in indian)

TRANSLATOR : (Yelling) Listen all of you, people of Delhi! The sultan may it please him is desirious of appointing a judge in his majesty’s administration . So if any of you think that, you are the ‘One In A Million’ person who has the appropriate qualifications to become a judge; you are cordially invited to enter the Judge Academy audition starting tomorrow. Now please queue up and fill this form . Completed forms can be handed over to the clerk in charge which is me. Thank you. (What?? nobody interested. Let me tell you this job comes with a kereta lembu you know and free housing plus watching belly dancing in the evenings. Still no takers. <<>>)

IBN BATTUTA : (In low tones)l..wow what a great opportunity for me. This job ia tailormada for me . I am a judge before and I think that I can fit in here but how am I going to get the job ? ? Ahah gifts to the sultan !! Naw that would be corruption and I’m supposed to be a judge ..Oh what the heck everybody’s doing it ..when you cant beat them jump in and join them What more I wont lose my invesments as the sultan is famous for giving bearers of gifts ..gifts of far greater value in return! Killing two pigeons with one sword .. erk there I go again a potential judge speaking of killing heh heh…where’s the justice !

!ACT 2, SCENE 2
[FLASHBACK SCENE]

IBN BATTUTA RECALLS THAT THE SULTAN IS PERHAPS A CRAZY RULER AND KNOWN AS A CRUEL MAN. THE SULTAN IS FOND OF AND CAPABLE OF PUNISHING NOT ONLY REBELS AND THIEVES WITH CRUEL AND BARBARIC DEATHS, BUT ALSO MUSLIM SCHOLARS AND HOLY MEN – JUST ABOUT ANYONE WHO DISAGREES AND RESISTS HIS WAYS OF DOING THINGS AND HIS POLICIES. HE IS PARANOID AND FEARFUL OF CRITICSMS. IBN BATTUTA IS HESISTANT AND WARY THINKING WHETHER IT IS SAFE TO WORK FOR THIS MANIAC , BUT IN RETROSPECTIVE THE REWARD COULD BE GREAT EVEN THOUGH THE JOB IS FRAUGHT WITH DANGERS

!SETTING : OUTSIDE THE PALACE
TIME : IN THE MORNING
CHARACTERS : IBN BATTUTA
SULTAN MUHAMMAD TUGHLUG
GUARD
PRISONER

SULTAN : (laughing heartily) ha-ha…what a great morning to start killing people what a great feeling to see fresh blood splurting ! Guard, do we have somebody to entertain me this morning ? any prisoner out there to be killed for my sport and pleasure?? I’m dying to see them die … dying!!! hei cant you see the joke ?

GUARD : Your wish is my command , your majesty!

THE GUARD STARTS BRINGING OUT THE PRISONERS ONE BY ONE AND SINGLES OUT ONE FOR IMMEDIATE EXECUTION …

Sultan : Nice shirt you have there .. be thankful we look after your welfare well here .. free meals and clothings …. now before I sent you on your final journey any kind words for me?

PRISONER : (sighing with hatred) Well your majesty the clothes you gave me was too tight so I give them to the rats in my cell to sleep upon and the food they were so delicious I cannot bear to eat them so I just put them aside to admire .
Your majesty I thank you all for these hospitality and my fervant wish is to meet God and inform Him that we have a kind ruler who thinks he is God. I’m sure God will be amused to hear that and hopefully will summon you to meet him in the very near future the quicker the better . Then your majesty… God will inform you where to go !! And hopefully I wont ever meet you there ….(smiling)
Thank you very much for letting me out of my miseries. Ammabaqdu.

SULTAN : (a little bit angry) Oh I see … a smart aleck ehh? How would you like to be stomped upon by an elephant or gored by a bull huh? huh ? I think your head looks best when sitting on a pole guarding the gates .. heh heh heh
Guard off with his head … insolent guy … let’s see whether he can complain to God without his head!!

THUS THE PRISONER DIED WITH HONOR…

ASIDE...

IBN BATTUTA : My what a personality this sultan has ! Wowee he is not a respecter of men or animals . Lifes are not sacred to him and he kills for the sport. Should I put my head in the noose and grab the job or should I just forget about it ? Hmm...the reward? Very attractive and rich pickings .Well, the job is not difficult I guess. I just need to take good care of myself and never ever make him mad! I’m going to bring him gifts bodek a bit and hope for the best. When the stomach growls the head bows. Gambate!

ACT 3, SCENE 3

IBN BATTUTA ENTERS THE AUDITION ROOM AFTER PERSON 1. HE BRINGS ALONG GIFTS FOR THE SULTAN: CARD CREDIT COLLECTIONS, ARROWS, SLAVES, SEVERAL CAMELS AND OTHER ANIMALS SUCH AS KANCILS KELISAS AND KENARIS . THE AUDITION BEGINS…

SETTING : IN THE AUDITION ROOM
TIME : SOMETIMES IN THE EVENING
CHARACTERS :
IBN BATTUTA
SULTAN MUHAMMAD TUGHLUG
PERSON 1

SULTAN : (looking surprise) Ibn Battuta from your cv I think you are most suited for the job . I have heard rumors about you but know I know they are truths . You are a great person indeed! Why the need for this audition. I have decided you are the ‘one In the million’! that we are searching for.

IBN BATUTA : Your majesty I am most humbly honoured and indebted to your graciousness . You are indeed a great and intelligent King! Your humble servant came to this audition on your creed and command

.SULTAN ; Ha-ha...of course of course ! Well, your arrival is a blessing; be at ease; I shall...give you such favors that your fellow-countrymen will hear of it and will come flocking to join you here! But before that could you brief me about you and your gifts.

Ibn Battuta : Indeed your majesty is very kind … I’ve been a judge before and travel all over the world and I bring exotic gifts from countries afar.

Sultan : Is that so !! I heard you brought me some strange animals that I never even knew they existed before?

Ibn Battuta : So true your majesty ..just a month ago I was in the Malay Archipelego and I stopped at the great port of Melaka ..would your majesty know ?..

Sultan : How can I know when you have’nt told me yet ?

Ibn Battita : Pardon my insolence your majesty … Melaka is ruled by a sultan and this sultan I heard is so infatuated with the Princess of gunung ledang that he is willing to let his son his only heir to the throne to be killed and sacrificed in the name of love

Sultan : (A bit annoyed) Ibn!! what has this to do with the animals that you are bringing as gifts?

Ibn Battuta : Pardon me again your majesty ! It is just that I brought some kancils ,kelisas and kenaris for your enjoyment … these animals can run faster than 90 kph can carry 5 adults each and what more they come in various colours as well as a 3 year warranty … there are a lot of these animals over in melaka …

Sultan : Hmmm you are indeed a very astute person my man !!

IBN BATTUTA IS THE CHOSEN ONE AND THE SULTAN TAKES HIS HAND SHAKES IT AND CONTINUES TO HOLD IT. EACH TIME HE SAID ANY ENCOURAGING WORD, IBN BATTUTA WOULD KISSED HIS HAND AT LEAST SEVEN TIMES.

ACT 4, SCENE 4

THEREFORE, IBN BATTUTA BEGINS WORKING AS A JUDGE. THE SULTAN TAKES GOOD CARE OF HIM IN PAYING OFF HIS DEBTS , GIVING HIM MONEY FOR HOUSE REPAIRS AND EVEN GIVES HIM ANOTHER JOB; TO TAKE CARE OF THE QUTB AL-DIN MUBARAK MAUSOLEUM. HOWEVER, A SERIOUS PROBLEM OCCURS WHEN HIS FRIEND, A SUFI HOLY MAN, REFUSES TO HAVE ANYTHING TO DO WITH POLITICS AND TRIES TO LIVE A RELIGIOUS AND PIOUS LIFE. HE SNUBS THE SULTAN AND REFUSES TO OBEY THE SULTAN’S COMMANDS. THE SULTAN TORTURES HIM AND HAD HIS BEARD PLUCKED OUT HAIR BY HAIR. AFTER TORTURING HIM HE WAS PUT TO DEATH .THE FOLLOWING DAY, THE SULTAN DAMANDS A LIST OF FRIENDS, WHICH INCLUDES IBN BATTUTA’S NAME...

SETTING : IN THE PRISON
TIME : SOMETIMES IN THE EVENING
CHARACTERS : IBN BATTUTA
SULTAN MUHAMMAD TUGHLUG
SUFI
THE MINISTER

THE MINISTER : Your majesty it is with a heavy heart that I wish to report than Ibn Battutas name is inscribed on the list . I would like to ask the king to decide on the course of action .

IBN BATTUTA : Oh God my name is on that list . I am a goner .Surely the sultan will come after me ! God please give me strength and courage to face this adversity

.SULTAN : Ibn Battuta you are a disgrace I don’t know how you of all person is involved with this man . Now you will take your own medicine . You will be sent to solitary confinement for nine days so that you can repent . Away with him!!

FOR NINE DAYS, HE RECITED LINES OF PRAYER 33000 TIMES, FASTING AND RECITEd THE QURAN FROM COVER TO COVER EACH DAY.

AFTER FIVE MONTHS...

SULTAN : (a little bit angry) Well, he is something...hmm...but I still want to get rid of him. Although he is just a friend of the Sufi, I still hate him! We cannot predict what he will do in the future!

MINISTER : What will you do, my great King?

SULTAN : I will send him to the Mongol court of China and as my ambassador.

MINISTER ; What? I thought you said you hate him but why do you want to give him such position? Just banished him away from here my King!
SULTAN ; That is what I am trying to do. Do you think he will manage to step his foot in China? Ha-ha...

MINISTER : Now, I understand. That the most wonderful idea ever ! Why did’nt I think of that before ? You are clever my dear King! It is not easy to go there, the rebels are out there, the robbers and even the weather are unpredictable! He will be dead in no time!

Sultan : (Sneering) That is why you are a minister and I am the king .

ACT 5, SCENE 5

IBN BATTUTA IS DELIGHTED WITH THIS MISSION. HOWEVER, ALL HE WANTED TO DO IS TO GET AWAY FROM THE MOODY AND TYRANICAL SULTAN. A FEW DAYS OUTSIDE DELHI, HE IS ATTACKED BY HINDU REBELS BUT HE DEFEATS THEM BUT IS ATTACKED A SECOND TIME WHEN HE IS ROBBED AND TAKEN TO A CAVE. THEY PLAN TO KILL HIM IN THE MORNING. IBN BATTUTA TRIES TO CONVINCE THEM THAT THEY SHOULD LET HIM FREE...

SETTING : IN THE CAVETIME :
SOMETIMES IN THE NIGHT
CHARACTERS :
IBN BATTUTA
HINDU REBEL 1
HINDU REBEL 2

IBN BATTUTA : Please let me go. I have nothing left. See? See? Please, I mean you no harm. I come in peace!

HINDU REBEL 1 : Should we let him go?

HINDU REBEL 2 : I Don’t know but he seems like the good guy. You know like Shah Rukh Khan!

HINDU REBEL 1 : Hey, to me he is the bad guy and you think Shah Rukh Khan is good uh huh he is a lousy actor!

HINDU REBEL 2 : Ahh...that is not the point! Well. Battuta, we will release you, as you seem like a pious person to me and you sing well too.

HINDU REBEL 1 : But you said because he looks like Shah Rukh!

HINDU REBEL 2 : No. he looks like Mawi and sings like one he must be an ardent fan of AF3 that is why we should set him free Ohh...Shut up! Go bring the horse!

IBN BATTUTA : Oh, thank you so much. May God bless you!

HINDU REBEL 2 : And if we meet again could you bring us mawi’s cd ….

ACT 6, SCENE 6

He manages to catch up with his group within two days, and continues the journey to Cambay. From there they sailed to Calicut.While Ibn Battuta visited a mosque on shore, however, a storm blew up and two of the ships of his expedition were sunk. Fearful of returning to Delhi as a failure, he stayed for a time in the south under the protection of Jamal al-Din, but when that worthyruler was overthrown it became necessary for Ibn Battuta to leave India altogether...

ASIDE.

..IBN BATTUTA : Oh, I am such a failure. I am not a great person. I have taken too much risks and now what? I don’t know what will happened to me after this...God help me please!

SUDDENLY...

IBN BATTUTA : What am I doing? This is not me at all. ibn battuta never will never cry will never give up no matter what . There is still hope and I know it. I am not going to give up. God always guide the righteous!! I have learn so much from my experience and I am willing for them to go to waste. Yesze !! Gambate! chaiyo! You can do it! just do it! Ibn Battuta boleh !!

He resolved to carry on to China, with a detour at the beginning of the journey to the Maldives. Setting sail from Ceylon, his ship nearly sank in a storm, then the ship that rescued him was attacked by pirates. Stranded on shore, Ibn Battuta once again worked his way back to Calicut, from where he set sail to the Maldives again before getting onboard a Chinese junk on the way back to China. This time he succeeded, and manage to enter China! The rest is history.